Last day work

Finally, it comes to the end. I will finish my job at TC library today and literally unemployed from now on. While I still hold a graduate assistantship at CU, I feel my connection with TC becomes weaker and weaker as I approach the end of my dissertation period. Yesterday, I had this strange dream in which I got a doctoral degree from School of Information Science with my best friend. I was happy and confused. The new semester always makes me nervous and hopefully this will be the last one of my student career and I will leave for good.

Alexithymia

Alexithymia (the Greek words λεξις and θυμος, literally "without words for emotions") 我觉得我得这个病了，你呢？虽然比麻疯病好多了，但是其实更加变态。这种病叫做“感情的哑巴” ， Peter Sifneos 1972 年发明的，就是指那些在理解、处理、表达自己感情上面存在缺陷的人。具体的表现有： 在识别、表达、和对付自己的感情方面存在问题，此外对他人的感情缺乏理解；常常对由于感情所引起的身体反应感到困惑；不怎么做梦，不会产生幻想，因为想象力有限；习惯于现实地、实事求是地、逻辑地思考，排除任何感情的因素。得了这个病的人经常汇报一些逻辑和实际的梦，例如去商店或者吃饭。Alexithymia 属于神经失常，它也是人个性的一种，可以用Toronto Alexithymia Scale来测量。 现在来测量一下吧： 你有多久没有对自己或者别人交待过自己不可告人的欲望了？ 又及：昨天就碰到一个真正变态的，在桑拿浴室里自慰，也许是温度和湿度都适宜吧。我现在天天都去体育馆，也不知道是犯什么病。有人说，具体地说是Will and Grace那部电视剧说，体育馆是同性恋的教堂，天天都要去报到。拜托，我不是啊。But I do feel good after the workout. The thing is I feel guilty if I am not going. I guess this is the typical mentality of thirty something.

Kingdom of Heaven

Kingdom of Heaven is a movie released on May 6, 2005, written by William Monahan, and directed and produced by Ridley Scott. It stars Orlando Bloom, Eva Green, Jeremy Irons, David Thewlis, Marton Csokas, Brendan Gleeson, Alexander Siddig, Ghassan Massoud, Edward Norton, Jon Finch, Michael Sheen and Liam Neeson. The story deals with the Crusades of the 12th century, and involves an Artificier and Enginer (that is, someone who makes siege engines), serving as a village blacksmith who goes on to aid the city of Jerusalem in its defense against the great Islamic leader Saladin, who battles to reclaim the city from the Christians. The script is loosely based on the life of Balian of Ibelin. This is not a movie for bedtime, not even after dinner. A lot of blood was shed and many tears. One should at least read the wikipedia version of historical account before seeing the film; otherwise, it is too easy to be confused. I feel like watching an English version of 三国演义 , with more blood, lust and frustration. The story is about the failure of the third Crusades in 12th century and is a mixture of history and fiction. To a large extent, it tried to paint a pinky version of Muslim and Christian relationship then which was criticized by many historians. The director defended himself by stating that he “sees this portrayal as being a contemporary look at the history. He argued that peace and brutality are concepts relative to one's own experience, and since our society today is so far removed from the brutal times in which the movie takes place, he told the story in a way that he felt was true to the source material yet was more accessible to a modern audience. In other words that the "peace" that existed was exaggerated to fit our ideas of what such a peace would be, because in the time it was a relative lull in Muslim-Christian violence during this period compared to the standards of the day.” It seems to me a real good explanation of WIKIALITY, a history is a story the majority agree upon. Orlando Bloom was too young and innocent to play the role. Even Jeremy Irons was a dread in the film. On the other hand, the Syrian actor Ghassan Massoud was praised for his portrayal of Saladin, described by The New York Times as "cool as a tall glass of water." The Americans are too eager to tell a story they don’t understand, to glory a history they don’t possess, and to make the history a light and portable version. The film is definitely better than Troy or Alexander, but it is not a work of art which we are looking for, a work with quality equal to The Name of the Rose.

Death of a writer

Naguib Mahfouz, the Egyptian playwright and screenwriter who won the 1988 Nobel Prize in Literature and was widely regarded as the Arab world’s foremost novelist, died today, Reuters and The Associated Press reported. He was 94. Here is a clip from his famous novel "Children of Gebelawi": Whenever someone is depressed, suffering or humiliated, he points to the mansion at the top of the alley at the end opening out to the desert, and says sadly, 'That is our ancestor's house, we are all his children, and we have a right to his property. Why are we starving? What have we done?' "

Jude the Obscure

Don't ask me why I am obsessed with this film. Just the way it is. Jude is a 1996 English film, based on the novel Jude the Obscure by Thomas Hardy and directed by Michael Winterbottom. It tells the story of a stonemason pursuing the cousin he loves even though both are married. The screenplay is written by Hossein Amini. The original music score is composed by Adrian Johnston. Christopher Eccleston played Jude in the file, who (born on February 16, 1964) is an English stage, television and film actor, best known for his roles in several high profile low budget films and television work. He is 100 times cooler than Jude Law. A great stage artist as well. In the Victorian period, Jude Fawley is a young man with dreams of receiving a scholarly university education. Circumstances conspire against him, however, forcing him into a job as a stonemason and an unsatisfactory marriage. He remains true to his dream, however, and years later, after his wife's sudden departure, heads for the city. There he encounters his beautiful cousin, Sue Bridehead, who shares his intelligence and his disdain for convention, and the two develop a romantic relationship. These unlikely lovers must struggle to keep their relationship from a disapproving world, however, or else face the tragic consequences of public scandal.

Wisdom of Crocodiles

梁普智 Po-Chih Leong, the director of 吸血情圣 The Wisdom of Crocodiles (1998) . Gosh, I love Jude Law in this dark film. Before he died, the vanpire asked the most strange question of all time: "Evil isn't just malice, murder and rape and massacre. Before everything, the devil is the father of lies. The lies you tell, the truth you don't tell. Everything hidden is theft. Everything reserved from those we love is fraud. And there's always something, isn't there? What everyone wants is for evil people to be off insidiously committing evil deeds. Then they can be separate from ordinary men and women and destroyed. But the line that separates good and evil cuts through every human heart. And who is willing to destroy a piece of his own heart?"

Patrick 

Mia 

One day in september 

old car old time 

Old car 

Hemmingway 

Old Havana 

Catedral de Nestra Senoradela Asuncion 

Che everywhere 

Che 

Cuban city 

人生理想

才高八斗会煮饭，学富五车能洗衣, 不用纳税

One Day in September

Watched this Academy Award documentary by chance yesterday. It was so dark, so I have to switch to Spanish Appartment for a resue afterwards. One Day in September is about the murder of Israeli athelets in Munich in 1972 Olympics. Although the film Munich from the past year makes the event popularized, not many people are aware of the 1999 documentary on the same topic. In contrast to the movie, the documentary describes the event from the perspective of the only surviving terrorist and uses a lot of footage of CBS Peter Jennis coverage of the event. Here is the introduction from Wikipedia: "The documentary begins with an advertisement by the Munich Tourism Bureau then continues with interviews with the wives of some of the murdered athletes, including Ankie Spitzer, wife of Andre Spitzer. It also features the first interview with Jamal Al-Gashey, the only surviving terrorist (the rest having been killed in the attack or later by the Mossad's Operation Wrath of God), who is in hiding in Africa. He wears a cap and sunglasses and his face is slightly blurred. There are various shots of the games getting underway, and attention is given to the lax security the Germans had at the games. The terrorists are seen preparing for the assault: Al-Gashey, a member of Black September, says he and the other members were trained in Libya before going to West Germany to begin the assault. The assault is described by Al-Gashey as well as some of the German security staff present. Footage of ABC anchor Jim McKay is interspersed, along with sound clips of Peter Jennings, to provide an as-it-happened approach. The film alleges that the rescue operation was poorly planned and executed: the snipers were not prepared, as well as being poorly positioned. The film implies that had the German government prepared better, the athletes might have been saved. Former Mossad Director Zvi Zamir was present at the airport during the final gunfight, and was interviewed for the first time about his views on the failed rescue. The film also alleges that the October 29 hijacking of a German Lufthansa jet and the subsequent release of the three Black September members being held for trial was a set-up by the German government."

Cuba

My friends just came back from Cuba, from a trip in this mysterious country. Beautiful scenery, revolutionary goods and Hemingway, are the best of the Island. In photos, the country looks old but attractive—the taste of old Rum. People look self content, elegantly dressed and enjoy their lives. The time seems to be frozen there: people still drive cars in 1950s, the opera house and Universidad de Havanas have not been fixed for 50 years, the landscape has not at all changed by industrialization. Because of the disinterest of the government to accelerate the economy, most of the cities preserve their original looks as they were in the Spanish colonial period. The prosperity of 1930s and 1940s due to the promising sugar industry boom fades forever. The tropical heaven in Hemingway’s eyes is lost to the revolution. Somehow, it seems people don’t care much. They are proud of the legacy of Che, even though they are barely lived with the constant shortage of foods. I feel a long lost sense of innocence.

What I love more than being a conference reviewer is--wikiality

I just found this great piece from wikipedia, which criticized the site itself. I am bored by some stupid proposals I just reviewed and here is the fun for all. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia_in_popular_culture Wikiality Colbert comments on Wikipedia In a July 2006 episode of The Colbert Report, Stephen Colbert announced the neologism "wikiality" for his segment "The Wørd". During the segment, Colbert joked "I love Wikipedia... any site that's got a longer entry on Truthiness than on Lutherans has its priorities straight." (This is true; at the time of the broadcast and currently its entry is approximately 40% longer.) Colbert then suggested that adding a fact to Wikipedia makes it true if enough people are convinced of it, thus creating a "wikiality" (Wikipedia reality) in which consensus of opinion trumps factual information. He suggested that viewers change the elephant page to state that the number of African elephants has tripled in the last six months, although the addition of false information to Wikipedia is considered vandalism. The episode resulted in a number of people actually adding the fallacy to the page and Wikipedia administrators restricted edits to the page by anonymous and newly created users. Colbert also suggested that George Washington did not have slaves and that Oregon is Idaho's Portugal. According to him, together "we can all create a reality that we all can agree on; the reality that we just agreed on." In a subsequent episode in which Colbert took viewer calls, a caller complained that he could not edit the elephant article because it had been semi-protected. According to the Global Language Monitor Wikilaity is one of the top T.V. buzzwords for 2006.[1] Wikiality now has its own website. The following is from wikiality's own site: Together, we can create a reality that we all agree on. 621 articles in American If enough people believe something is true... it is — just like on Wikipedia. Welcome to Wikiality, the Wiki dedicated to upholding and documenting truthiness. Wikiality isn't about what "factonistas" might sneeringly deride using phrases like: "statistical trends", or the "objective truth", or, "For the last time, President Bush doesn't have a 102% approval rating!" There's a level of truth and meaning beyond (and, really, having little or nothing to do with) what's "demonstrably true", and that's what we're dedicated to keeping track of. If you feel something strongly in your gut, or would like to help us keep track of the strong gut feelings of our dear friend Stephen Colbert, feel free to jump in and help out. So, if you can handle the truthiness, take a gander at the articles we've created so far as a good place to start, or maybe just create your own. And remember, when writing, don't use your brain; use your gut. Just make sure your gut knows how to spell, punctuate, format, and use proper grammar.

Velvet Goldmine 

Claire's Knee 

恋曲XP

罗大佑从《恋曲1980》唱到《恋曲1990》，之后又不厌其烦地写了《恋曲2000》。二十年过去了，不仅偶像老了，连我们这些流鼻涕地粉丝们也变成了老大不小的高龄年轻人了。随着罗大佑的升级换代，我们也淡出了歌坛，昨天有人在卡拉ok时选了罗大佑的老歌，大家笑道，再唱就该唱《恋曲XP》了。可不是，我们也得长长行市。 想一想为什么年轻的时候我们需要偶像，这真是一个有意思的问题。因为年轻，我们还没有形成自己的想法，但是我们又充满了表达的欲望。所以我们要寻找偶像，通过他们来表达我们自己。通过与他们的认同，我们要与之前的几代人有所分别，要成就自己独一无二的存在。但是不幸的是，我们是这么得多，而偶像是这么地少，所以最后我们还是一团一团的聚集在偶像们周围，成为了没有个性、没有自我、狂呼乱喊、泪流满面地粉丝。想逃脱被同化、被归类的命运，但是在偶像的面前，我们变成了一砣一砣的垃圾。尼采在《悲剧的诞生》里说人类挣扎在酒神迪奥尼索斯情结和太阳神阿波罗情结之间：前者代表了感性的狂迷，而后者代表了理性的激越。我们从粉丝到冷漠成年人的蜕变，也是如此。我们把自己的感官合上，不再听歌，不再去看演唱会，不再关心网上明星们的八卦，不再让自己为了别人的喜怒哀乐而动心。但是偶然也有例外，我们会在白驹过隙的刹那，重新感到偶像的温暖。当我每次上网打开BBC Radio 2的Sounds from 1970s，跟着史蒂夫.哈里一起重温那个70年代，我就感动地不能自己。那个摇摇晃晃的70年代，那个一点正经没有的70年代，那个一切都政治化但是一切又都非政治化的70年代，那个在大麻香烟的味道中浅吟低唱的70年代，那个在《Velvet Goldmine》中所描写的70年代！那个70年代是我心里最柔软的地方，是我对偶像时代最后的致敬。之后的偶像对我来说，尤其是网络的偶像对我来说，无耻的成分含量太高了。 在结束了偶像崇拜之后，每个人都要为自己建立一点安身立命的根本。对有的人来说是音乐，对有的人来说是消费，对我来说是书籍。在纽约呆久了，你会发现每个人所知道的纽约都不同，每个人都有自己的catch。朋友说48街和第六大道附近有很多乐器行，可以打谱。这对于我来说就像刚刚得知冥王星不再是九大行星之一了。我所知道的纽约，套用戴锦华的话来说，我的纽约历史地标是形形色色的旧书店。曾经看过一个朋友所描写的在巴黎的莎士比亚书店，不仅是爱书人的精神家园，而且真地为艺术家和年轻学生提供住宿和膳食，条件是必须研究店里的藏书。纽约也有很多很神的书店，除了大名鼎鼎的号称有18英里藏书的Strand，还有很多星罗棋布的小书号。Union Square 附近的STRAND的确是书虫们的家，比起后来到伯克利专门去看的Cody Bookstore，这里真是乱得让人舒服。新书旧书杂陈，偶尔还能淘到很好的版本，只是价格不菲。我更喜爱的还是华盛顿的Second Story bookstore。有一次朋友开车带我到一家分店去挑书，那家分店居然是一个由废弃的工厂车间改装的书库。如果你带着干粮，可以几天几夜不出来。仅仅艺术史的藏书，就可称得上是汗牛充栋，车载斗量。买不买都无所谓，店员们都自顾自的读书，才懒得抬头看你呢。我家附近的迷宫书店也不错。因为是哥大的教材书店，所以书店的二层涵盖了各种文学经典，举凡教授指名道姓要在课堂上用的书，这里都能找到。考虑到哥大教授们读书涉猎之广，你就可以想见书店的规模了。除此之外，书店也有很多哲学和艺术类的藏书，因为书太多，所以台阶上也堆满了，你可以一个台阶一个台阶地读上去，最后在顶上发现哲学类的书籍，这就叫做”哲学王”吗！ 有一次到犹太博物馆去碰到关于Maurice Sendak的展览。那里根据他的童话故事来布置展览，既有他所绘的插图，也有大量的来自于他的故事的玩偶，父母们可以和孩子们一起观看根据他的故事所改编的动画片，甚至欣赏他为歌剧院所设计的舞台布景（他为《魔笛》所设计的服装和布景真是美轮美奂）。我最喜欢的是Where the Wild Things Are。通过展览才了解到他的许多作品都是以二战中犹太人所遭受的迫害为背景的，也包括这个故事。从展览出来，我买了一个小小的像章作为纪念品，上面写着：The Wild Thing—READ! 如果你看过侯孝贤的《咖啡时光》，中间的女主人公所读的故事就是Sendak 的《Outside Over There》。 又及：昨天看了Bernardo Bertolucci的《偷香》，里面的Liv Tyler 真是落入人间的天使。她演这部电影的时候也正是19岁。在托斯坎半岛醉人的夏日时光里，一切都是这么的悠闲自在，自然而且生动。这部电影让我想起Eric Rohmer的Le Genou de Claire (Claire's Knee)，对于年轻而美好的肉体以及它所蕴藏的生存欲望，谁会不为之所动呢？ 又又及：昨天的聚会送一个纽约客到三番去，大家讨论了半天东西岸的不同和可能的生活质量的差异。其实，我觉得对异乡人来说，哪里都差不多。我们的肉体可以适应各种的环境，但是我们的心灵要脆弱的多。有时候听一段北京的相声和大鼓，都能把我们的泪给带下来。一个人搬家所带着的，是她/他的精神家园。为了离开，她/他得有足够的勇气对过去的自己说一声再见。这，是很难的。